Stories of Resilience

I have become very close to my dear sister-in-law and in a recent trip to Ukraine we sat at the kitchen table while she confided a trauma she was experiencing.

She was hired a few weeks after a less qualified girl, whose surroundings were quite a bit better than the cold, chaotic and more demanding work station Tanya was assigned. When she raised the subject with management, they said nothing could be done to improve her situation at the moment. As time dragged on, Tanya felt her feelings of resentment toward this girl grow to the point where she said: “I hate her.” Then she asked a startling question: “Is it a sin?”

Tanya had a hard upbringing and only a rare and casual exposure to religion of any kind. I struggled to put the question in some kind of context to find an answer.

She might have been fearful of the rumoured Orthodox view that if you sinned, you’re going to be punished: You or a loved one will get sick, lose a job, be in an accident . . . But God will get you?

Or maybe she was asking me to drop the full weight of the 10 commandments on her, and make sure she hits rock bottom with a few select texts that shout the most severe condemnation?

I looked at her blankly and I believe the Holy Spirit revealed this question had no context beyond our situation.

Since she knows I’ve become a Christian, the change in me has drawn us closer and earned her trust.

I decided she was actually asking me if she’s a bad person. She was seeking comfort and affirmation in her plight and was searching for the antidote to this poison that was erupting into anger toward everything and everyone in her life.

“Is it a sin?” I hugged her with every word of comfort, affirmation and respect that I could muster.

Next time we are together, I firmly believe the Holy Spirit will have given her the answer in a way far more effective than anything I can offer.